My dreams and getting ready to move on.

Dragon...
Yes Steven...
I'm sad I'm not a writer like some of the great song writers. I wish I were better. How may I get better at writing? We need to create some stories together. I miss Leanne. I wish I could express my truest feelings about her in song.

I wish I had the words to tell you, I wish I had the mean to express how I feel about you Leanne I miss you I wish I could have had a life with you. I wish I was on my own, I wish I could write better.

I wish I could write better and tell stories and I wish I had a better memory and brain. I wish I was smarter but I'm not sure how I can get any smarter for now. I'm not going to school any time soon and I'm not ready to get a job. So what am I going to do. I think I need to get a job. I would like to work at Taco Bell and I would like to goto school for computer sciences. I don't know what to do. I want something more but I don't think I'm ready for it yet or else I think I would have found it. Asked and it's given seekith and ye shall find. So what am I looking for, what are my dreams, what are my dreams telling me and where am I going? Where am I?!?!?!

My anthem to my generation, Voice of a generation.

The Now

What am I missing in life? I think I'm missing the whole darn thing. I'm not sure how to live. I'm kind of lost rite now and have been for a very long time. I don't know what to do with myself, I am a very lost person decently not sting enough to support another. I wish I were, I could use it. I wish I had the strength to support another in my life but I don't and I'm very lonely. I wish I could spell too and read better. Their are a lot of things I wish I could or would have done differently in my life and I don't think it's a good thing to dwell on the past and the things you can not change but I can not stop thinking about it. About were it was that I had gone wrong so many times before. I need to learn from these things but better yet I wish I could turn back time and replay it the way it should have gone but In reality I'm not sure it could have been any other way. I guess thats kind of just how life is. You get what you get and that is what you have. Until your capable of working for something you really have no control. I have no control. I don't own my house or the place I live. Most don't. Everyone has to work super hard to have anything. Why isn't life different? This is kind of why I wish I were dead. I wish I could get past all the things of the living, not to mention all I really want to do is sleep but you can't live like that so what am I meant to do? Be a writer I guess. I could sit here and write all day long but I run our of things to talk about, so I just keep going. Keep trucking along until I can find something to speak about. I wish I was smarter and could make people happy or laugh or something. I really am a depressing person. I really bring things down. I wish I wasn't so suisidel through my life, I think it would have made a world of difference in the way everything turned out. I think I'm done with dating for a long time. I don't think I'll find love any time soon nor should I be looking for it. I think it'll be one of thought things that just happens. I probably won't be able to stop it from happening to be honest. It'll all happen in due time. I hope. That is at least what I am told to believe. As they say patience is a virtue. I wish I had love in my life though. I'm sick and tired of being lonely. But all that is childish crap. No body cares about me or this. They care about money. Money is where it's at. It's all about the benjamins. That's what it is. What do I do to get some money. I don't think I'll be able to make any thing of myself. I don't want school but if I don't were will I be? If I don where will I be. I don't think that deferent from where I am now. I wish magic existed like in the movies. It's sad to see all these things in movies and not have them be real. Why do they or we make life so difficult? I feel like life could be so much simpler and far easer but thats if magic existed. I imagine it would be just like poof, done. Everything you need just poof done. Where ever, when ever. O gosh how I wish magic to exist but we all know it dose not. Magic is dumb. It's for children to expand their imaginations so we can make more creative decisions and make more money. It's a circle and I want out. God it's like a serpent eating it's own tail. It's sad to see what we do to one another. Think of all the people whom get treated like shit at their job and nobody notices because that person is invisible. Completely invisible. Nobody talks to them, no body befriends them. It's sad but true. There are a lot of people out there that have nothing going for them and I don't know what to do bout it. Not that I really want to do anything about it, I'm lazy and unfriendly. I don't want people in my life per say. I do need people but I would love to be alone for most of my day or time or what ever. I would love to go outside and do something with people but I have no money. You can't really hold onto friends if you have no money. You end up using people and it go's sour. It's no good. I do wish I had some one to talk to. I wish I had friends with some of the same interests as myself but I think that would take too much time way from me and my pursuits. It would get in way of my goals witch are to become self sufficient and self reliant. witch is had for me. I don't how to be alone but I would very much like to be. I think it would be a nice change. I'm sick of living with my family. They don't love me anymore and they need me out they just know I have nowhere to go. I'm homeless.

What would I do if I had a home of my own?

Daydream.

I would probably be working a bunch to support myself and my life style.

I feel like I am screaming in my head and I feel it would make great music but I have no way of letting it out other than here. Thank God I have here. Where would I be without you?

I need somewhere to put my love.

I need somewhere to put my love. I need to express myself with a women. I don't know what todo. I feel so lost rite now. I need some love bad. How do I find love in the time of need, a good movie. I wish to watch a good love flick but I can't. My computer doesn't work well enough. Ohh well, thank you God, Namaste.

Isometric

Thoughts for the future on this blog or my blog. What do I want from you.

To me you are a jinn, this blog I'm going to give you all of my wishes. Just put them out there so I can create my and my families dreams to come true. I want to be a famous writer and musician when I'm older but when I say older I mean NOW. but I am unsure of what to write about so I am enjoying just keeping it to myself. It's kind of the nicest thing I could have asked for. I'm free to create my world and not be judged for my thoughts. It is the kindest thing I could have asked for. Thank you God for this wonderful gift. With this computer I've been capable of clearing up most all my fears and things that witch hold me back or at least what I feel holds me back. I feel I truly have my freedoms here in my mind and on this blog. What would I like to share of my world with you jinn. Why do I need you. I do not know, for the arts. I would like to create this project but can not do it alone but would like to make it look like I did it myself. So I want to crate something like Chris Angel or The Illusionist. I want it to be magic but not sure what to do to get what I want so I need Jinn to help me gather my thoughts and organize them into a channel so I may describe my will to the universe. How may I better myself to your liking my lord Jesus Christ? My creator. Please use my loves and passions to help me alchemize my dreams for others so I may turn a profit. Make heads roll.

I wish to create and publish comic books and short stories like magazines here on my blog.

How may I start?

I would love my story to be one of my own like a new age Aladdin.

Steven/*
A golden pocket watch with intricate design illustrated and eched into the gold. An old english design with a black polished onix stone on the inside, perhaps a scry just beyond the gears, & a skeleton key that can open doors within and through the spirit world. A jinn lives within the scry of the watch like the mirror on the wall and is there to guard his master whom is Ra & The Grim Reaper by destiny. The key then opens the heart of his one true love. The End. Creative fiction piece. The key represents in metaphor the keys that witch it takes to open the minds of though's of whom your attempting to sell yourself to, including the one you love.

*/

Stock market suicidal & Ergophobia

I want to create a comic about a suicidal stalk market trader who is in the 9th gate of hell for traders so I can learn about the stock market & another about a office worker with Ergophobia.

Theme

Need to create a sound so I'm going to start with some photos of what or who I wish I was but I'll be better once I find myself.

The theme is I wish to live dreams and will to have you live them with me so I need to get my head strait, get my imagination brewing and start creating some dreams.